Thursday, September 23, 2010

Just some random thoughts..

It's been a while since I've updated our lives. We have decided to stay in Las Vegas. As much as I would move to Texas in a heartbeat, Vegas seems to be where we are planted, so we are determined to bloom here. What does that mean for us? It means Bryce will soon be a UNLV Rebel ( but he will NEVER admit it:) A big deciding factor for us to stay here (along with endless prayers and temple attendance) is Cade's football coaches and the Rams organization. We were very blessed to get him into this organization. They are the best in Southern Nevada, and his main coach is the football coach at Western High School. The Rams organization have 6 of their boys (men now) playing college football. These coaches are in it for the long haul, and have complete faith and dedication in Cade and his quarterback abilities and talent. This is such a great opportunity for him, and one we may not find anywhere else. So as long as Cade and the Rams both live up to their end of the deal, the one question we keep coming back to is *why change a good thing?*
Which brings me to my next thought (if I am boring you at all, feel free to skip this post, I am just putting some thoughts out there) What to do with our house. We have been working on a home modification loan for exactly one year. The bank finally came back to us with a somewhat reasonable offer. We have plenty of things that we love about our house, and plenty of things that drive us crazy. Now we have to make the decision to stay here or go and rent. There are plenty of pro's and con's to each. Some of the con's being: repair/maintenance - they both take time and money as a home owner. Neither of which we really have with Bryce in school full time, me working 3 days a week, and 4 kids all in different activities. We also have HOA dues, home owners insurance, pool maintenance, etc.. On the other hand, the kids love this house, the yard, the pool, the neighborhood, the space, etc.. but is it worth the extra money to stay? After praying hard about it, I'm leaning more toward renting, still within the same school boundaries. The kids love their school and teachers, so we really want to stay in this area. Of course being a homeowner is ideal, but at this point in our lives is it really the right/reasonable thing to do? We don't know for sure. I do know that whatever we do decide it will be our decision based on what we feel is best for our family, relying on the Lord for guidance in our decision.
Another aspect of *why change a good thing?* goes to the school portion. I have learned of a charter school nearby that does K-8th grade. Apparently it is pretty popular around here. I think there are definitely pro's and con's to this as well. I'm not one to jump on the "bandwagon" with the majority, but I can see why some do. Some of my thoughts on charter schools is that it would be nice for Junior High age, to give the kids more attention and focus on striving to improve their skills and encourage higher learning. Not throwing them into Middle school in Las Vegas - that is definitely a huge bonus. If I thought bad things were going on in middle school in Utah, I can only imagine what goes on here in Vegas. However, with that being said, the other thoughts in mine and Bryce's minds were - have some faith in our kids and their strengths. Can we truly have faith in them and their decisions if we put them in a "bubble" during elementary and Junior High? It is true that a lot of LDS kids go to this charter school, so what's going to happen when they get thrown into high school with the whole mix of kids and personalities, behaviors and choices that they have not had to deal with and stand strong against? So far Cade has made lots of friends at school, and football. Kids he would be going to Junior high with. Suddenly those kids would be gone, and he would be forced to start all over again. Haylee as well. She has some good friends at school. Although both would have some friends from chuch at the school, they still have plenty of friendships they have developed at school. Which brings us back to the question *why change a good thing?*
I know they are only in 1st and 4th grade, and a lot can change between now and Junior high years. I am not looking through rose colored glasses, I know they will have their struggles and trials. As a mom, my first instinct is to stick them into this charter school and save them from middle school in Las Vegas. But, after stepping back and looking at the big picture, I truly believe
that my kids are strong enough and have faith and core values needed to survive. I think we will at least give them a try. Bryce and I both agree that the more we talk openly and communicate with our kids, and not try to hide the evils of this world, they are better prepared to take it on, and stand strong. We have watched Cade with this and football. He is surrounded by not one single LDS kid on his team. He has seen how the kids talk and act. He realizes their choices are different than his, but he stands tall and is not afraid to be different and stand up for what he KNOWS is right. Haylee hasn't had to deal with this as much yet, but I feel we need to give her the chance to make her decisions and see what happens. We can take it one child at a time, one school year at a time. If things start to take a turn, then we can look at other alternatives, but at least we gave them a chance to make their own choices.
I think it is safe to say Bryce and I have been through it all. We have both made extremely bad and extremely good choices. We both grew up with the wrong crowds making all of the wrong choices. I now believe that as parents, it will help us as we raise our kids. We know what is out there, and we also know how accepted everything else is here in Vegas. That is why we know that every single day we give it our all to incorporate the gospel into all aspects of our kids lives. The kids are learning to pray just as hard as we do that we can make the right decision regarding our house, Bryce's schooling, me working and just our lives in general. We involve them in the good and the not so good in our lives, so they can learn how it feels when the blessings finally do come. It's a great testimony builder for them, and a great teaching tool for life in general for them to be involved.

So in my theme of *why change a good thing?* I guess I seemed to be answering some of my own questions. I do know that Bryce and I have great attitudes about this entire situation, considering everything going on. It seems to be contagious as our kids are pretty optimistic about whatever may happen. I believe we have already given them a firm foundation so that they already know that we will make the best of whatever may come our way.

I know some of you already do the charter schools and some do regular public school. So if you have made it through this entire post without falling asleep, I would love to hear your input on either side. The good and the bad of both sides. Hopefully I haven't offended anyone, just putting your thoughts in writing can sometimes help you realize what deep down you already knew:)

7 comments:

Amber and Co. said...

Thanks for the update! I'm so glad to hear that things are working out for your family. Sounds like you have put lots of thought and prayer into your decisions and you are making the best you can. That's all we can do when it comes to making decisions. As far as homes go, I've def. learned that being a home owner isn't the ultimate goal. We now rent in New Orleans and I am so happy to not be worried about all the things you listed! It's not our problem while Burke is in school, yay! We do have yard and pool maintenance, but that's it. Good luck with all your other decisions. We love you guys and miss you!

Tyler Jorgenson said...

I'm with Amber. I have always been one of the real estate guys that would tell people owning isn't always the right thing. You hit on some of the major reasons, maintenance and other costs add up. There are some tax and other benefits to owning so like you said there are pros and cons. Also, accepting the modification could just buy you more time to make the decision... it doesn't have to be made all at once.

We're just starting to look at charter schools, but for now our Elementary is doing well.

Ingrid said...

Oh! I was so hoping that you would come to Texas. I would love to have a Las Vegas friend here. :) But, it sounds like things are right for you and your family right there. Things fall into place for a reason, and you will be in the right place for blessings to come to your family. You have great kids, and they will do well no matter where you are.

sarah donaldson said...

We were in the same dilema last year as we were also offered a loan modification. The payment was going to be ok but they never got around to telling us what the final terms would be. We were not sure if it would be a 60 year loan or if they payment would eventually go back up, or who knows. They did tell us that very rarely will they lessen the principle amount due, and that scared us. Your case may be different but we just thought that what if we ended up in the same situation of a lost job or something three years from now after we have rebuilt our credit only to end up in the same place. (knowing our house would still not be worth what we owed.)We also did not want to pay for a house for 60 years! We have no idea when/if the market is going to turn around and we figured if we made the decision to stay we wouold not be able to leave for probably 10+ years. Unless we wanted to short sale which would again take us back to square one with our credit. Every situation is different but I cannot begin to tell you the stress that has been relieved since we sold the house and started renting. We did not realize the stress we were putting on ourselves and our kids. The attitudes we had and the bad moods. my kids are younger and did not understand a lot. But it took us a long time to realize that a house, credit, space, etc are not important. It's our marriage and kids, it's being happy and being in the moment and not playing with my kids while my head is spinning with the last crediter that called. Having our house and bills constantly in our thoughts put a bigger strain on us than we ever realized. We are so much happier now and honestly have not missed it, not for one day! even though we have downsized by half!
At this point we have NO desire to buy again. This is our first time renting and it is so nice! We broke even on our first house and ended up being upside down by 150K on our second house (that after paying way more each month than rent would have been.)
I don't want to try to sway your decision I just wanted to tell you our experience.
I chose a charter school at this point not for the seperation but for the better education they are supposed to recieve. That being said, with the way my daughter is so boy crazy right now when she gets into Jr high it will be because of the seperation not the education! :)

Johnson Family said...

Your faith ceases to amaze me. With all that your family has been through, the Lord has always come first when making your decisions. I'm sure you will be blessed because of this. Good luck with all those major decisions.

Jori said...

We are in the same boat. We will probably be looking for a rental soon. Crazy times. Good luck with everything!! :)

QnA Drapers said...

Ahhh Staci- when did we get so grown up? Makayla starts 7th grade next year. Her elementary school here is K-6th, so I've avoided middle school one extra year. Many people here homeschool their kids for middle school- for many different reasons. Aftern having been in 3 different school districts, I think whats best for the kid is different for each family. You're doing the right thing keeping both eyes open. When the time coems you'll know whats best for them. I too want Dylan to have some LDS friends, or non-lds friends with good standards. It is much easier to choose the right when youre not the only one doing it! So- give them loves from us- we miss you! Good luck with all your adventures ahead.